Incredible Stories of Psychic Powers

Ronald Brak: Tell me about your son’s psychic abilities, Madame.

Aunty Intellectual: Well, my son had a dream that we went to the zoo and I wouldn’t let him out of the car. Then, when we did go to the zoo, that’s exactly what happened.

Ronald Brak: That’s incredible.

Aunty Intellectual: And what’s more, my husband had a dream that he jumped in the chimpanzee enclosure and was made king of the apes.

Ronald Brak: And is that what happened?

Aunty Intellectual: Yes it is! They’ve been able to reattach one of his generative organs and he’ll be released from the hospital on Tuesday.

Ronald Brak: Astounding!

Aunty Intellectual: And that’s not all. I myself have psychic powers. Often I will be thinking of one of my friends and my friend will ring me.

Ronald Brak: That’s incredible. How often does this happen?

Aunty Intellectual: Everyday! I spend most of my time thinking about my friends and calling them.

Ronald Brak: And how many friends do you have?

Aunty Intellectual: Oh lots! Dozens! Three. Except I’m only talking to one of them right now.

Ronald Brak: One last question, Ms Intellectual. When the phone rings are you even consciously aware of the fact that you’re answering it?

Aunty Intellectual: I try to spend as little time conscious as possible.

Ronald Brak: Thank you for your time Ms Intellectual, as I have now sucked it out of you using temporal vampirism.